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Tuesday, December 28, 2004

"Walking the Plank"

Last night after work I headed to "Java Mammas" to have the match. Chess is a game that I played only a little growing up, but enjoy any chance for competition. Last night Lydia and I met to have the highly anticipated chess match. There was a lot of trash talking prior to this game.

I ended up getting to "Java Mammas" early and ran into Chase from Owings Mills Horizon. We had a good conversation about relationships/friendships in general. Conversations like these make me realize that the idea of more guy fellowship is something that the community needs.

Lydia then showed up and it was on! I think she was slightly scared.(yeah right!) I must say it was an intense game. We played for at least an hour and only had three of each other's pieces.
I ended up making some strong moves but in the end Queen Lydia prevailed. As the match neared its end, she redefined the word, "Zugzwang" or "Walking the Plank." I did enjoy the competitive game, and it was surely that.

It's strange, afterwards we chatted and I realized something later. I find that opening up and letting others know about my past can be like walking the plank. I find it hard to open up and let certain people know my skeletons. Can you relate? I guess if I think that the other person can't relate, then I feel that they may think less of me or judge me for some of the mistakes i've made. I don't know why this is. Even people I have become close too, I still feel reluctant to open up to my past. I wonder if this is a bad thing? I don't feel it is necessary to let everyone know where you have come from, but I do feel that I need to open up more to some. My past shouldn't be mystery. It is a testament to what I have overcome and grown from. This is something I want to work on so others may learn to understand me better. We'll see...

1 Comments:

Blogger Lydia said...

Banks, I have to say, it was an excellent match. We will have to play again. Maybe you will beat me one of these days. hahaha! j/k
And again, thanks for sharing your testimony. Toodles!

~Lydia

12:08 PM  

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