Crossing the Road

This may sound odd, but I remember in great detail the moment my grandmother taught me to look both ways before crossing the road. I was about four years old. She brought me to the edge of the road and said, "Now Jon, see that frog on the road; that could be you if you don't listen." I remember hating the idea that I had to look twice both ways! But after I did cross it and came back, I felt like a hero. I did something on my own! Well the reason for this quick story, has to do with a sermon I heard last week.

At Grace they are doing a run through of the old testament. This past week was on the book of Exodus. The part I grasped tightly was the story of Moses and his life before God had revealed himself. Moses was one tough dude! This was during a visit to his fellow people. Check this out...

"One day, many years later when Moses had grown up and become a man, he went out to visit his fellow Hebrews and saw the terrible conditions they were under. During his visit he saw an Egyptian knock a Hebrew to the ground-one of his own Hebrew brothers! Moses looked this way and that to be sure no one was watching, then killed the Egyptian and hid his body in the sand." Exodus-2:11-12

See, like the road that my grandmother had so tediously made me aware of the danger. Moses had checked both ways. The problem is Moses and all of us when dealing with a situation that we question, sometimes we just look both ways twice; forgetting to look up! Moses found guidance on his own and didn't look for God's help when making this decision. I don't know about you, but there are many instances that I decide to just look both ways. How can we discipline ourselves to not look at the frog on the road but the voice in the sky?

At work I find myself on Mondays pulling an "Office Space." Peter in the movie didn't want to work the weekend, so he was told to check both ways and leave work before he would have to face his boss. We need to learn to just look up, and face the situation.

Has anyone found extra change in the soda machine and looked around before taking it? Or found a lost animal and looked for the owner? I believe the angel and devil on the shoulder is just the same as looking both ways. I only pray that I am strong enough to continue to look up and face the situation with God.

This metaphorical road is long and wide. We as Christians just need to stay strong and remember that looking both ways just doesn't cut it! We need to strive for the ultimate relationship and lean on our Maker. Let's keep our heads raised high!

Weekend Work

I survived the trip to Chambersburg PA! This past weekend I had the luxury to spend my time counting thousands of odd ball widgets. I left for PA Friday night to this strange place called Chambersburg. Every state has a hick town and this was one of PA's finest. It was mandatory for the employees to be there and they had us start at seven AM. We didn't finish on Saturday until nine-ish. I swear there were times where I thought I was becoming delusional. We found out after the last count that the crew from Baltimore had to stay and count the next morning. Ah!!! It was a nightmare come true. So, the crew decided to go to this place called "Razzles" across from the Holiday Inn. I kid you not, this place was something out of seventies biker movie. First of all, I have concluded that ninety-five percent of the employees at my company are complete and utter rednecks. I am not being derogatory, just stating a fact. This made this place like home to them. I would have to say the indifferent feeling reminded me of "Candyhill" resorts. This was the epitome of a "dive." But strangely, I checked out the jukebox and saw Switchfoot's song, "Meant to Live." That was cool because I was surrounded by decadence and needed that hint of God. The night was long and the craziness only got more crazy. I believe at one point I was dancing and realized I had more teeth in my mouth than the two girls dancing near me. Yikes! It again was just scary!

Sunday morning was definitely a slow-to-get-up morning. I ended up splashing my face and walking out the door. After getting there they announced that there were problems with some of the printing and told us we could leave. So I made the two hour trip home in a little over a hour. Soon as I dropped my luggage to the floor I was out. Slept for a few hours and ventured off to my soccer game. We lost a close one to a rival team. Err... I hate that. The cool thing was I got a chance to go to a service at Grace. Since I was unable to make church this week at "Horizon", It was gratifying to worship and feel God. I needed it. I was also so very happy to see so many of my friends from Grace. It's been some time since I seen some of them. I am going to try to make an effort to stay in better touch with them. Well, that was my less than exciting weekend. I hope that I will never have to tell you anymore stories about the chilling town of Chambersburg.

Contentment

We live in a world where fast isn't fast enough, rich isn't rich enough, looks aren't pleasing enough; well you get the picture! Is anyone seriously completely happy with every aspect of their life? Today I was thinking about this.

Recently, I purchased a new car. I was driving today and thought(man this car is not fast enough. I should have added the larger engine.) So is this routine for everyone? Is it possible to just accept the blessings you have and live life? I was brushing my teeth this morning and said to myself, "I wish my teeth were whiter." So as most we go out and buy the whitening tooth paste or whitening strips. I was once told that a woman is never happy with her weight. If she weighed one pound she still would want to lose a half pound. How bizarre our society has become.

Don't get me wrong I am just as guilty. I go to the gym to get conditioned but also to look good. But will we ever be satisfied with how we look? How can we become content with what God gave us?

Lately, I have been battling the idea of work and whether it is my place to be where I am at. I don't believe anyone thinks they are paid enough, and we all want more.
Is a new job really going to make me happy, or maybe you? Eventually, don't you think that you will get to a point where things are too familiar and boring? The glass ceiling will hit you on the forehead and again the whole process of this lack of contentment will occur again. I wonder if it is just our perspective?

I walk around and talk and hear my friends talking about their girl friends, fiancees, or even wives. I hear a mix of good and bad. Can we be totally content in our relationships? Is it suppose to easy where the picket fence and dog come with the Wellesley graduate? I don't know anymore. We all seem to want the perfect relationship, perfect job, big house, and wonderful family. Shoot, I am still waiting for God on a lot of this stuff. I am not trying to jump ahead of myself. I am just merely saying when we do get into relationships, land that new job, buy that new car, are we going to be content? hmm...

Philippians 4:12-13 states: "I have learned the secret of contentment in every situation, whether it be a full stomach or hunger, plenty or want; for I can do everything God asks me to with the help of Christ who gives me the strength and power."

All I can say is that contentment still seems like a secret to me. I guess with maturity and spiritual growth you will find contentment something easier to understand.

Lord God, I speak out to you lord. I ask you, please to shed any barriers that may distance me from you. Give me strength and the will to continue to pursue you in my daily activities and life. For through you I know I can find contentment! In your glorious and holy name I pray. -Amen

Fun Times

This weekend presented some fun times. Whether it involved magic markers, burnt "jiffy pop," or some soccer action, the weekend ended up being fun.

After a long week I decided to pick up Joshua Harris's new book, "Just A Hint." It definitely brought up some good points. But it was a typical Harris book.

Saturday morning I got up early to meet Rebecca. We had great plans to surprise our pal, Jenn. We met early and made some signs for support of her accomplishment of finishing a half marathon. Still amazed. We ended up getting caught up in conversation and lost track of time. But at least we did get to see her. It was disappointing that we missed her finishing though. Congrats Jenn!

Later that night a bunch of up met up for a bonfire. It was very chill or you could say chilly to say the least. The attempt to cook up some "jiffy pop" was not a success. We all now understand why the product didn't last very long. Tali was quoted on saying, "that's the worst spent three dollars in a long time." Or something like that. Some very interesting conversations came up and it ended up helping all of us in our lack of sleep for church. Again, Eli... Thanks for opening your house to us!

Today's service was great. The worship was unique had a great edge. Good stuff... The message also rocked. I am definitely enjoying the "Encounter" series. This week again was a great turn out in numbers. God so far has blessed us with the launch. I am sure we will bring more to come.

Later today a few of us made it out to practice a little for our first soccer game. I must say that I was very impressed with the play. Erica, Bekka, and Rebecca were all playing solid. I have a good feeling about this league. Regardless, it's going to be fun. Also, it was great to have Tronster and Marc come out. It is always fun to have the brother duo battling it out. Afterwards we all went to "Padonia Station".
The food was great but it took way too long. I found out also that it is not such a good idea to gorge oneself before playing or doing physical activities.

Later tonight we ended up shutting out the opposing team. A great win for us. I definitely will never eat a full meal before any other games. Take my advice it surely doesn't help a thing!

Rampage

Your Homicidal Rampage! by crash_and_burn
Your name:
Weapon of Choice:	Cigarette lighter
Your Favorite Target:	Homeless people
Your Kill Count:	1,727,143,866
Your Battle Cry:	"Who let the dogs out?"
Years You Spend in Jail:	4
How Much Money In Damages You Cause:	$8,951,734,727,570
Your Homocidal Insanity Level:: 14%
Quiz created with MemeGen!

"Wasteless"

"Wasteless"

Yesterday is gone,
Today is here;
While tomorrow is near.
Don’t waste a breathe,
Once bitter, now tender;
Trying to find the road.
So much grief,
So many tears,
I’m so lost without you.
Take his hand;
To seek no longer yourself,
But in him.
Tomorrow will surely be a different day.
Let’s shine,
What a captivating sight that will be!

Shelving a book

I don't know if anyone can relate or has struggled when dealing with past relationships, but most recently I had to make a big decision.

I normally don't blog personal stuff, but the outcome of this decision has given me strength, so I felt like sharing.

My girlfriend in college was my life for so many years. The story was full of romance, excitement, challenges, and unfortunately tragedies. I once quoted our relationship as, "a roller coaster ride." Unfortunately, we ran out of tickets.

The following relationships always failed, I think mostly because of my fear of commitment but also because I was jaded to emotional relationships.

Well, as I hit on in a previous blog, I ran into Courtney at a bar recently. Slowly we have started to communicate more and more. It was starting to confuse me. My intentions were possibly to help her but I found myself thinking of the "what-if's." I have never known anyone like I knew her. And being single and not seeing her in over three years I struggled with what to do. So I just came out and asked her! "Why are we talking again?" For a couple weeks I struggled with a decision that was very tough. I knew that I was suppose to end this and offer a sense of closure to the relationship. I've known her since I was nineteen years old. I felt like I was deciding to banish a family member.

I talked with a couple people about this and I thank you for listening! I felt like if I was to proceed in this direction I would be not only be distancing myself from my friends, possibly a future relationship, but my Lord. Her heart is hard and I now know it is not my place to heal it.

I decided recently to take this piece of my past and shelve it. I most definitely have learned from this relationship and all my relationships. But what I seek now is so much different. I guess that is why I am so timid to start a new relationship. But the future looks promising! This past week has been different. Even though I cut ties to a relationship, at the same time I feel myself building new and better relationships.

I left my long time ex with my testimony. I only pray that one day she finds the truth and that she finds her way to the living book.

Purple & Black

Today was a great day! The Ravens pulled out a squeaker versus Rebecca's Deadskins. Today was also a huge day for Horizon . Today was Towson's launch. The highly anticipated event was a success. We saw new people from all ages and diversity. I believe the future looks grand. Worship as usual, was awesome. Today just seemed different. I was somewhat humbled.

After the service we took over the food court. Had some good conversations with Mark and Josh. It was awesome to see Bethanne. Sounds like things are rocking for her. It was also very cool to meet some more southern hospitality.

After lunch I ventured back home to catch some zzz's. Last night's concert at the "Thunderdome" rocked as we watched The Seventh Seal band rip it up. I got home around 2:30ish. Hence the fact that I needed some REM.

Tonight's soccer game was a challenging one. We had no male substitutions for the first half. I played mid-field for almost twenty minutes straight. We all were tired and the awesome winning streak came to an end.

After the game I flew to the Reichley's. I just did get there a couple minutes after kickoff. Rebecca was dressed to the gills in maroon and wearing moccasins. We had a good crew the watch the game. Nolan, Tronster, Bekka, Mel, Dave, and myself versus poor old Rebecca. Mel's undercooked brownies were sweet! But the sweetest part of the occasion was to cheer and watch the Ravens come from behind and chalk up another one on the loss column for the Redskins.

A New Number

Do birthday's mean as much to us now as they used too? Do you remember all the gifts and the parties from your childhood? I wonder if they are going to be more memorable than the later ones or future ones? At least for me, the average birthday now is much different.

Anyways, last night after a twister of a bible study of the Old Testament, and the third chapter of Genesis; we took our awesome friend, Jason "the music-maker" Hummel out for a bite and drink. We started out at this tiny table where I felt like a "canned sardine." We relocated to the enjoyment of horrible service. A party of six took over ten minutes to get their order placed.
I tried an O'douls for the very first time. The non-alcoholic beers are not that bad. Altogether it was a great time to just hang with each other. I was so happy that Kristyn came to study and out to celebrate. You rock! After eating, Jason and I played some eight ball. We always have the most competitive and close games. Again, I just wanted to shout out another happy birthday to my brotha! "Happy B-day!"

Today, actually is another one of my friends birthdays. How convenient! One blog post, two birthdays. Did someone say, "Kill two birthdays with one blog?" Oh my... I hope not!
Anyways, it's also Jenn's twenty-seventh birthday! So it's officially in cyberspace. "Happy Birthday!"

Well, I hope that you both enjoy these special days. It's been awesome getting to know both of you!

Fervor

Fervor is defined as a great emotional warmth or intensity. Lately I have been battling a question that I hear from a lot of new Christians and seekers. "How do I get to feel that fire or gain that passion for the Lord"? And most recently the word Fervor came to mind. Recently, I have had some amazing conversations and have started to come to some of my own conclusions.

See, describing the feeling you get when you know God is talking to you through prayer, or when you are comforted by our Lord, the feeling when a song moves you, or even the new perspective you gain through a verse, is all so hard to describe. Recently, I found myself expressing my feelings to others in a way that I felt they didn't understand. I almost felt that my enthusiasm was too much and foreign. Now I feel I have something to work on.

What I have concluded is that God lives within us and comes out during the most extreme level of our emotions. Love is by far the easiest emotion to notice in where we feel God. Recently someone described the feeling you get when you get all giddy about the person you are with, married too, or dating. It sounds common, but yes we are all in a relationship if we know Christ. I wouldn't call the feeling giddy but I will say that my heart beats faster and I do feel a sense of comfort and warmth when I think of him. 1 Corinthians 13:4-7,13 defines love perfectly. At some point you just smile and say, "Thank You."

Some may stop and say is that it? No, I believe we feel God in all our emotions. Sadness is an emotion that I commonly feel his presence. Whether it is through prayer, or maybe a worship song that has brought a tear to your eye, that is you connecting with God through your emotions. For me this is a very humbling emotion. I have been singing at church and have had to stop because of how moved I was. It is not common that I cry but odds are recently it is in the acknowledgement of how amazing my Lord is, and the understanding of this ultimate sacrifice he made for my imperfections.

Guilt also has become something more prevalent in my life. As I strive for holiness I have become more aware of how imperfect I am. Everyone has a past and I am no exception. For me I believe it is hard not to say that my most extreme feeling of guilt involves how we always will sin and the feeling we are not worthy. Guilt plays a huge role in everyone's lives; but we all even I, have to remember that we all fall short, and that we need to learn to accept forgiveness. This great verse gives everyone hope. "Yes, all have sinned: all fall short of God's glorious ideal; yet now God declares us 'not guilty' of offending him if we trust in Jesus Christ, who in his kindness freely takes away our sins."- Romans 3:23-24

Until recently I did not understand how you could mix the feeling of anger with God. Through some discussion I realized that we reach out to the Lord when things do not work our way. Some do this in different ways, but the point is that we are going to him our center. I believe we as people need to trust him with his decisions and humble ourselves to realize that it is not about us. "If you are angry, don't sin by nursing your grudge. Don't let the sun go down with you still angry- get over it quickly; for when you are angry, you give a mighty foothold to the devil." -Ephesians 4:26-27

Fear can be viewed in one of two ways. As a negative and scary thing that we avoid, or as a way of overcoming a situation or obstacle. I prefer the later. I have been fortunate to have a personality that doesn't condone much fear. I think it has some to do with my competitive spirit, but on top of that I have learned that I am protected by the ultimate body guard. "Fear not, for I am with you. Do not be dismayed. I am your God. I will strengthen you; I will help you; I will uphold you with my victorious right hand." -Isaiah 41:10 When we are very afraid the first thing we say is, "God please help me." The only thing to truly fear is God.

Those are just a few examples of how I see God working through our human emotions. My point is that when Christ lives within, you are transformed and you can feel and see this through our emotions. Sometimes we are just less aware. We as Christians come to our Lord in our trying times, joyous times, and fearful battles. As we develop to understand the origin of these emotions we learn to understand how God is working in our lives. And this is where the fire is burning. So with the question, "How do I get to feel that fire or passion?" The answer lies first with acceptance of the truth, and then proceeds from within.

Lord God, I pray deeply for those who seek you Lord, and yearn for a passion to truly know you. I also Lord pray for those who have had that fire and need another spark. Please Lord reveal yourself to them either through others, emotions, prayers, songs, or as usual in your own creative way. I thank you with unending passion. You are my Lord. In your precious name I pray, Jesus Christ. Amen

Weekend Madness

It is not always typical for me to have a full weekend but this past one was pretty darn close.
It consisted of painting a room, a guys night out, tennis, Java Mama's, an awesome Outback Steak, a great church service, a crazy game of dodge ball, and a key playoff soccer game.

Friday was a weird day since it was my uncle's funeral. It was tough to get up after chillin with Tronster and the Thursday night link group the prior night. It was cool to see and contribute to another dynamic. As I was traveling to DE for the funeral I found out that there was an accident on 95 that shut down all four lanes. I had to call and didn't make the funeral. It did give me some great alone time with God though, I needed that. Later that day I spent spackling and painting Paul's soon-to-be room. It took a good five hours. Thank goodness it's done. Later that night a bunch of us went out to check out the new sports bar in Westminster, "Timeout." Dinner was pretty good and we had an amusing time with the bartender. Overall it was cool to hang out with the guys.

Saturday morning was a little slow to start. I had plans to play tennis with Ben Ogden later in the day. I showed up and can say I wasn't feeling the best but hey... I wanted to play some tennis-Andre Agassi style! I know a little too enthusiastic. Anyways, it was great to be able to play and hit it around with someone of a similar caliber. It's been a while. Great game bro!
Saturday night I headed out to Java Mama's for the second time. This time to listen to Josh Smith sing some covers and to chill. It was cool to see the mixture of horizon folks. Tronster and I then proceeded to go to the new "Outback Steakhouse" in Owings Mills. I am so stoked that it is three minutes from my place. The food rocked and it was great to throw back ideas with good ole Tronster.

I thought Sunday's service was great. The mix of worship and prayers was a great segway into launch. Wow... it's so close! Lunch rocked, I have missed it recently but made it to this past week. It is cool to see some of the new people getting to know others and begining feel more comfortable. Great stuff. Later that night the highly anticipated dodgeball match went down. I have to give it up to Rebecca. She was all over this event and organized something that was not only tons of fun, but offered all of us that played something to remember the next morning. PAIN... I had to bail an hour after playing to head to my soccer game. We had our final playoff game this season. I am not trying to be arrogant but we are unbeatable right now. We won our forth consecutive game last night. I took another direct hit in the chest, that makes three in two games. I seriously think it makes me want to play harder. I know, I am a sick kid.

Altogether this weekend rocked. I only hope I have more like this soon. I believe next weekend is going to be more overwhelming than full. I only pray that God prepares all of us for what he has to bring us. Again, what a full weekend.